did somebody say stubborn

sometimes the decisions we make in life defies logic and reason and every sensible bone in our body. and yet it strikes a raw nerve and deep in our guts we know it's right.

moons ago, i decided on him and i'm sticking to it.

and people can come and go and advice and counsel can be heaped upon me and words of wisdom stuffed in my ear and he can move on to whatever or whoever or return to what life was before. i don't care! this is my life and if i choose to stay stuck in a moment then it's my prerogative. i'm not imposing this on anyone. i'm not forcing you to indulge me in my delusion. it's nobody else's problem but my own. was i consulted when the decision was made? no. so then don't tell me how to deal with it. don't tell my friends that we've reached a decision when it wasn't unilateral. don't tell me how to cope, don't teach me how to and don't predict that i'm going to move on because i am REFUSING to budge! everyone talks about moving on. what's so great about it? how do you know you're moving on to something better? i think it's lame to "move on" just for the sake of needing some form of motion because you can't stand being still and taking a pause.

me? i'd rather stay in my rut.